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IDEAL MARRIAGE: MONOGAMY

The contrary view, which we are adopting here, is that we need not fear for the future of monogamy. The monogamic impulse is so deep-rooted in the nature of most persons in our society that no safeguards are required to preserve it. Instead, these safeguards are a hindrance to the attainment of any monogamy worth having. Monogamy, as a mere form, is not worth preserving. Only the sort of monogamy that represents the fulfillment of the monogamic ideal can be considered valuable.

To the modern Western world, the ideal of monogamy implies a permanent attachment based on the highest degree of romantic love, and therefore is perfectly spontaneous and requires no bolstering by moral, religious or legal sanctions. To suggest that a couple who sincerely love one another have to be held together by a sense of duty is to insult the quality of their love. But if it is true that some couples do have to be held together by a sense of duty, then it is certain that they do not love one another and therefore that they should not remain together. It would thus seem that we have a choice between two sorts of monogamy: a monogamy that is purely voluntary and perpetuated by the inner bonds of love and therefore desirable to persons of finer sensibilities; and a monogamy which is enforced, though love has vanished, and is therefore intolerable to a person of ideals.

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